The Fruit of the Spirit Pt.4: Patience
There is a well-known saying: ‘Patience is a virtue, possess it if you can. Seldom in a woman, never in a man.’ It's an exaggeration, but most of us would acknowledge that we often struggle to be patient. We live in an age described as ‘the now generation’ (Alvin Toffler). Everyone seems to want everything ‘now’. We've instant coffee, fast food, entertainment at the press of our fingertips, millions buying goods on credit that they can’t afford, sports teams expecting instant success from their managers, and many seeking gratification before the commitment and covenant of marriage.
Some years ago, an advert simply stated, ‘take the waiting out of wanting’. That’s what millions try to do. They've no patience to wait for anything. It is very easy for us to be influenced by this attitude. Our lives can be marked by impatience, and we can be unwilling to wait for things. In home-life, work-life, and personal relationships generally, incalculable misery is caused by impatience. This rare virtue of patience is indispensable if our lives and relationships are to be healthy and happy.
The greatest example of a truly patient person is the Saviour. In the Gospels, we see both Jesus’ extraordinary patience with people and His remarkable endurance in the most terrible trials. Right at the outset of His ministry, Jesus was tempted by the devil in the desert to be impatient, to pursue the easy path to glory. Satan tried to get Jesus to go for quick results. He sought to lure Jesus to use His power to establish His kingdom in a way that by-passed the cross. But Jesus rejected all three enticements by the devil and chose the slow, arduous route of establishing His kingdom. He determined to walk the way of teaching, discipling and serving His followers. He set His face to go the way of sacrifice and suffering.
Jesus wasn't only patient with His dull disciples. He was also very patient with the fickle crowds who flocked to Him to see a spectacular show of miracles or simply to have their bellies filled with a constant supply of bread and fish. Jesus was very patient too as those who were ill pressed in upon Him for healing. He was even very patient with His enemies who tried to trap Him in His talk. Above all, we see His phenomenal patience and perseverance as He set His face to go to the cross.
At last, the sinless Son of God suffered the greatest act of injustice in the history of mankind. He was crucified as a criminal by wicked men. Yet we are told in Hebrews 12 v 2 that Jesus endured the cross, ‘scorning its shame’, because of the joy that was set before Him. What an astounding attitude and perseverance in the face of such suffering
Is it possible for us to have such perseverance? It must be, for this is exactly what Paul prayed for the Christians at Thessalonica. ‘May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance.’ (2 Thessalonians 3 v 5) What inspiration Jesus is for us in days of darkness and distress. We can focus on His long suffering with us and His endurance for us!
God clearly intends for us to be believers who demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit, patience. Note two ways patience should be seen in your life. If you belong to Christ, you need to be...
Patient With God
For Bible readers, it's no surprise that we need to be patient with God as we follow Jesus today. In the Scriptures, the servants of the Lord were often tempted to be very impatient with God. The prophets and psalmists sometimes complained bitterly to the Almighty, at times expressing their frustration and impatience with God very forcefully.
Why? God seemed to be so slow in doing what they thought He should be doing. The Lord appeared to be taking forever in fulfilling His promises and seemed indifferent to the blatantly rebellious and sinful. He seemed to be letting them off and to be slow in blessing His people and in using them to extend His kingdom.
Christian friends, this is something we can easily identify with, isn’t it? From our perspective, the Lord can seem so slow in answering our prayers. Many of us have prayed for years for unbelieving family members and friends to be converted to Christ and for God’s kingdom to advance in our nation, and yet the spiritual darkness appears to be increasing! So, we can be tempted to be like God’s prophets of old and to get impatient with the Lord. There is something vital to realise. Our impatience with God is bound up with our misunderstanding of time. God’s time is not our time. We live in time. But the eternal God is not bound by time.
He doesn’t measure time like we do. In Peter’s day, sceptics had no faith in the second coming of Christ because it had been so long delayed. Peter assured his readers that God has a different time-scale from us. In 2 Peter 3 v 8-9, he wrote, ‘do not forget this one thing, dear friends, with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish but everyone to come to repentance.’
‘God is not slow', but His purposes being worked out often seem to be slow from our view point. That is why we must learn to wait on the Lord as we pray, serve, witness and worship, believing that He will fulfil His purposes in His way and time. The psalmists stress the importance of waiting upon the Lord. For example, we're told In Psalm 37 v 7, 34 that when godless men prosper in their wicked ways, we're to be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him, walking in obedience, trusting in our wonderful inheritance.
At times, we can get weary of waiting. In such times, we must remember God's promise in Isaiah 40 v 13 'They who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not be faint.'
When our spiritual strength and enthusiasm are sapped by challenging circumstances, we're to draw close to Almighty God that He may renew our inner strength. We're to pour out our hearts to our heavenly Father, casting all our cares and burdens upon Him. In His infinite wisdom, power and grace, our Covenant God can deal with all our concerns in the very best way. We must be patient with our Sovereign Lord, who will work things out for our good and His glory in His way and time.
Being patient with God shows that we trust Him and His Word, no matter what happens to us. Our heavenly Father delights to see such humble, child-like trust in Him.
Patient With Others
We must learn to be patient with other people, especially with fellow Christians. When Paul wrote 'love is patient', he had the fellowship of believers in mind. Patience is a crucial aspect of caring for others. Being patient is the way a loving person responds to difficult people.
Paul appealed to the Christians in Ephesus to relate to one another with patience, 'bearing with one another in love' (Ephesians 4 v 2). Clearly there were tensions at times in the congregation at Ephesus. Perhaps the believers didn't always agree with each other concerning secondary matters. Perhaps brothers and sisters with different personalities rubbed each other up the wrong way. Paul implored them to 'be patient, bearing with one another in love'. No Gospel church is perfect. When people expect Gospel churches to be perfect, it will only lead them to be disillusioned. All of us who are born of the Spirit are new creations in Christ. But we're still imperfect. We are in the process of being made like Christ but we're not there yet. So Gospel churches are made up of growing but imperfect Christians. And not all believers in Christ are easy to get on with. So, patience is absolutely essential.
Think of two particular things that others may do to us which call for patience.
People may mistreat us.
If this happens, we're to be long-suffering. The Lord calls us to endure if we're on the receiving end of ridicule or scorn or if someone spreads malicious rumours about us. People may seek to provoke us, or we may be insulted or rebuked unfairly. Perhaps we'll be persecuted outright or be the victim of office politics in our workplace simply because we follow Christ.
In all such painful providences, God calls us to suffer patiently under the mistreatment of others without growing resentful or bitter. We're to fix our eyes on Christ and to pray for the Spirit's enabling to be like our Saviour. We're also to trust in the justice and certainty of God's judgement, just as our Saviour did when He suffered.
Christian friends, whenever we're mistreated, we must remind ourselves that our God is slow to anger (Exodus 34v6) and we're called to be like Him! James exhorts us to be 'slow to become angry' (1 v 19) and Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13 v 5 that love is not 'easily angered'.
What is the way to develop this slowness to anger? It's to reflect frequently on God's remarkable patience with you and to thank Him daily for how longsuffering He is with you. Pray daily for the Spirit to enable you to act in a manner that reflects and honours our Saviour.
People may disappoint or irritate us.
This can happen a lot in life! People can do or say things that irritate or disappoint us, even those we are closest to. We can be disappointed or irritated in many ways. It may be as simple as a friend being late for a coffee with us or someone in our family having a habit that irritates us or a referee on a sports field making a wrong decision. All such irritations need to be handled with patience produced by the Spirit.
What is the biblical way to deal with big disappointments? Perhaps someone in your own family circle or church family or school or work place has really let you down. Our calling is to display Christ-like patience when hit by such disappointments.
Impatience with the failings of others, whether real or imaginary, often has its roots in pride. Whatever abilities God has given us, we're not to see ourselves as superior to others. Whatever understanding God has granted us, we're not to think we're better than those we disagree with. Paul instructed the believers at Ephesus, 'Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.' We must remember Peter's key principle in 1 Peter 4 v 7 'love covers over a multitude of sins.'
If the Spirit's love is in your heart, this should cause you to overlook the shortcomings of others time and again. Of course, if someone wrongs you in such a major way that your love can't cover over their sin, you need to go to the person concerned and speak to them one to one about it. You need to point out your problem with them personally and give them the opportunity to explain themselves or to repent. Perhaps they haven't even realised they've hurt you. Seek to have the matter resolved, to be reconciled with the one who has hurt you. But there are numerous shortcomings in others that we should overlook because of the Spirit's love in our hearts. There'll be countless times we feel disappointed or irritated with others that we shouldn't dwell on.
In Colossians 3 v 3, Paul puts forbearance and forgiveness together. 'Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.' Therefore, displaying patience with others is essential in everyday life. If we fly off the handle at every little annoyance, our relationships will be badly effected, and our witness for Christ will be ruined. If we're going to be part of a happy family and a happy church family, the Spirit's patience is essential. Patience has to be practised, especially when we are mistreated or disappointed or irritated. It may take only one flying off the handle to ruin a healthy relationship or to ruin our witness for Christ!
May the Spirit produce within us in increasing measure both patience with God and patience with others. This is vital if we are to grow to maturity in our Christian lives.
