Augustine of Hippo
‘The Confessions’ – Stealing From a Pear Tree
Augustine of Hippo (354-430 AD) is considered by many to be the greatest Christian theologian the Church has been given by God. His teaching and writing was foundational to the trajectory of the church, not only in his own day, but through the Middle Ages, especially during the Reformation and to the present day.
Born into a Christian home in the small town of Thagaste, in Northern Africa (modern day Souk-Ahras in Algeria), Augustine's parents had high ambitions for their son and he was sent to school to get an elite education. He was a good student, especially in philosophy, rhetoric and Latin. However, he soon began to rebel against his parents and began an affair with a young woman when he was just 17. (This long and detrimental relationship would last until shortly after his conversion and produced a son).
Augustine spent many years in hedonistic living and studied many of the different philosophies of his day, becoming a follower of Manichaeism for around 10 years . However, his persistent mother, Monica did not give up on him and followed him all the way to Milan. It was through her witness along with that of a friend and finally Ambrose, Bishop of Milan, that Augustine was converted at the age of 31. The prayers of a godly mother answered! A few years after his baptism he entered the ministry and was sent to Hippo in North Africa, where he spent the rest of his life preaching, pastoring and writing.
He was a great defender of Christian orthodoxy and his writing resulted in the excommunication of the infamous British monk, Pelagius who denied original sin. Pelagius taught that all of humanity was morally neutral and our free will remained intact, enabling us to choose to believe in and obey God. Augustine in his zeal for truth was thrown into the middle of the controversy against this charismatic British monk. The stakes were high and the letters written back and forth forced Augustine to refine his understanding of sin, divine sovereignty and salvation.
Over one thousand years after his death, Augustine’s teaching on sin, divine sovereignty and salvation was rediscovered by a German Augustinian Monk called Martin Luther and the rest, as they say is history. Augustine’s legacy is seen in all churches which affirm original sin, divine sovereignty and salvation through faith alone in Jesus Christ.
Augustine’s teaching on sin and grace is perhaps best seen in his own spiritual biography, ‘The Confessions.’ Augustine, using hindsight is able to not only see God’s amazing plan of salvation in his life but diagnose and illustrate sin in a way that has perhaps not been surpassed since. We also see the power of prayer to convert sinners in the example of Augustine’s mother, Monica, who for decades prayed earnestly for her son’s conversion.
In this excerpt, Augustine reflects on his adolescence, when he, along with some friends stole some pears. At first we may be tempted to ask why Augustine recounts this seemingly ‘insignificant’ sin. However, Augustine uses this sinful act to give us a wonderful illustration of sin. There was nothing special about the pears, in fact he ‘had an abundance of better pears’ and ended up throwing the stolen ones away. If alone, he wouldn’t have even bothered trying to steal them. It was the public nature of his sinful act, stealing in front of his friends that not only tempted him but gratified him during and even after the act.
We know from scripture and from our own experience that when alone, we are prone to sinful thoughts and actions which no one but God sees. But as Augustine illustrates there is a special kind of allure to sinning in front of others. Perhaps it’s a risqué joke, a piece of juicy gossip, cursing, petty theft (like Augustine) or more serious sins. All things that if said or done in private would give us absolutely no satisfaction. All sins that even as Christians we might have a tendency to downplay. The reason we sin in these ways is because we, at times enjoy sinning, especially if it gains us popularity with others.
Augustine saw with hindsight that the satisfaction we get from sinning is fleeting and is quickly replaced with a feeling of emptiness and guilt. His illustration reminds us to be diligent at all times, guarding ourselves from the temptation of wilful sin, especially in the presence of others. The author of Hebrews reminds us that we do not do this alone:
‘Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.’ Hebrews 4:14-16.
Those pears were truly pleasant to the sight, but it was not for them that my miserable soul lusted, for I had an abundance of better pears. I stole those simply that I might steal, for, having stolen them, I threw them away. My sole gratification in them was my own sin, which I was pleased to enjoy; for, if any one of these pears entered my mouth, the only good flavour it had was my sin in eating it. And now, O Lord my God, I ask what it was in that theft of mine that caused me such delight; for behold it had no beauty of its own…
…What was it, then, that I loved in that theft? And wherein was I imitating my Lord, even in a corrupted and perverted way? Did I wish, if only by gesture, to rebel against thy law, even though I had no power to do so actually--so that, even as a captive, I might produce a sort of counterfeit liberty, by doing with impunity deeds that were forbidden, in a deluded sense of omnipotence?...
…What profit did I, a wretched one, receive from those things which, when I remember them now, cause me shame--above all, from that theft, which I loved only for the theft’s sake? And, as the theft itself was nothing, I was all the more wretched in that I loved it so.
Yet by myself alone I would not have done it--I still recall how I felt about this then--I could not have done it alone. I loved it then because of the companionship of my accomplices with whom I did it. I did not, therefore, love the theft alone--yet, indeed, it was only the theft that I loved, for the companionship was nothing. What is this paradox? Who is it that can explain it to me but God, who illumines my heart and searches out the dark corners thereof? What is it that has prompted my mind to inquire about it, to discuss and to reflect upon all this? For had I at that time loved the pears that I stole and wished to enjoy them, I might have done so alone, if I could have been satisfied with the mere act of theft by which my pleasure was served. Nor did I need to have that itching of my own passions inflamed by the encouragement of my accomplices. But since the pleasure I got was not from the pears, it was in the crime itself, enhanced by the companionship of my fellow sinners.
By what passion, then, was I animated? It was undoubtedly depraved and a great misfortune for me to feel it. But still, what was it? “Who can understand his errors?” We laughed because our hearts were tickled at the thought of deceiving the owners, who had no idea of what we were doing and would have strenuously objected. Yet, again, why did I find such delight in doing this which I would not have done alone? Is it that no one readily laughs alone? No one does so readily; but still sometimes, when men are by themselves and no one else is about, a fit of laughter will overcome them when something very droll presents itself to their sense or mind. Yet alone I would not have done it--alone I could not have done it at all. Behold, my God, the lively review of my soul’s career is laid bare before thee. I would not have committed that theft alone. My pleasure in it was not what I stole but, rather, the act of stealing. Nor would I have enjoyed doing it alone--indeed I would not have done it!
